Wednesday, September 24, 2008

A little comic relief...my first kiss

I was thinking about different events that happened to me in my life and what impacts they may or may not of had on me. And one thing that came to mind was my first kiss. I'm sure everyone at some point or another dreams about the first kiss. There are tiny bopper magazines that teach you different "techniques" so that you can ensure that your fist kiss is perfect. They show you how to practice on a mirror or the back of your hand to know that you are doing it "right." I was no different, although I never was the type that practiced, and maybe you will think that I should have by the end of my story. So when I was about 15 I was friends with a guy in my ward named Curtis. We hung out all the time and ultimately became best friends. We went to different high schools, but worked at the same grocery store, and went to the the same early morning seminary. It was custom for us to exchange notes every morning in this notebook we kept. We would hang out outside of school and over time we found that we may actually be starting to like each other. We never wanted to tell our parents because we figured that if they knew we liked each other or we weren't "just friends," we wouldn't be able to spend as much time together. One of our favorite things to do together was go to the dollar theater. Our parents would usually drop us off and come pick us up later. (I know I know, this is a lot of detail, but I promise im getting to my point) So one time we were at the movies and as soon as the movie was over Curtis leaned over and gave me a quick peck kiss on my cheek. That was it and we got up and left. It was rather out of no where, but then the next day in seminary when it was his turn to give me the notebook back he had written that he really wanted to kiss me but was too scared to do it. So I wrote him back, don't be scared if you want to do it just do it. I guess in a way that was a bad idea for me, something about knowing that the kiss was coming just made me sick to my stomach with nerves. So then the weekend came and it was time for us to go to the movies again, I was a nervous wreck. We choose to see Bridges of Madison County, although I have no earthy idea what happened in the movie. I was scared out of my wits, every time he would glance towards me I would be like oh my gosh is this it!?! And then he tapped me on my shoulder, I turned towards him and and he moved towards me. My heart sank, this is it, and then he comes right towards me and we smack right into each others noses. Move, I said, to which he replies no you move. Great, this is going great so far! So I move and we kiss, well kind of, sort of, little kissing for about 15 seconds and then I stop. "We have to leave" I say. And hes all, you want to move to the back of the theater, and Im like no lets leave the movie all together. we left and walked over to Mervyns and just dinked around and didn't say much until it was time for his mom to come get us. What was wrong, why did I stop? It made me sick, down right sick to my stomach so I knew nothing more than to bolt. I didn't explain myself, I didn't know what I was feeling other than I figured something was wrong, maybe I didn't like him, or maybe what we were doing was wrong (I laugh at this now thinking that I reacted like this to a simple kiss) but what can I say I was 16. So I pretty much ignored him for a few days, sorting through my feelings and trying to figure out why I was so sick from all this. And finally I write him a note, it didn't say much only that I thought we were "moving too fast." HAHAHA almost 2 years of being friends and a simple kiss was moving to fast. Needless to say he didn't take it all that well, and never really spoke to me much after that. We worked together for a few months after that, but we were more like acquaintances after that. About a year later I wrote him a letter again trying to explain myself a little better, but it was to no avail. Needless to say after an experience like that, I didn't kiss again for about 2 more years.

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2 comments:

Amanda Idell said...

Oh my gosh!! That is horrible but pretty funny at the same time. You have to laugh at being so young.

Lauralee Altice said...

haha, how have I never heard that story? That's great! I can relate...a little different case but bad just the same. Remind me to tell you some time.
I love the picture to go along with it.