Life or something like it

The movie “Life or Something Like it” asks the thought-provoking question: if you knew you only had one week to live, how would you spend it? Would you bother showing up for work? Would you put right all those bad relationships and feelings you've shoved deep into your subconscious? Or would you just keep on keeping on?

Tim McGraw: Live like you were dying

He said: "I was in my early forties,
"With a lot of life before me,
"An' a moment came that stopped me on a dime.
"I spent most of the next days,
"Looking at the x-rays,
"An' talking 'bout the options an' talkin’ ‘bout sweet time."
I asked him when it sank in,
That this might really be the real end?
How’s it hit you when you get that kind of news?
Man whatcha do?

An' he said: "I went sky diving, I went rocky mountain climbing,
"I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu.
"And I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter,
"And I gave forgiveness I'd been denying."
An' he said: "Some day, I hope you get the chance,
"To live like you were dyin'."

He said "I was finally the husband,
"That most the time I wasn’t.
"An' I became a friend a friend would like to have.
"And all of a sudden goin' fishin’,
"Wasn’t such an imposition,
"And I went three times that year I lost my Dad.
"Well, I finally read the Good Book,
"And I took a good long hard look,
"At what I'd do if I could do it all again,
"And then:

"I went sky diving, I went rocky mountain climbing,
"I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu.
"And I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter,
"And I gave forgiveness I'd been denying."
An' he said: "Some day, I hope you get the chance,
"To live like you were dyin'."

Like tomorrow was a gift,
And you got eternity,
To think about what you’d do with it.
An' what did you do with it?
An' what can I do with it?
An' what would I do with it?

"Sky diving, I went rocky mountain climbing,
"I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu.
"And then I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter,
"And I watched Blue Eagle as it was flyin'."
An' he said: "Some day, I hope you get the chance,
"To live like you were dyin'."

"To live like you were dyin'."
"To live like you were dyin'."
"To live like you were dyin'."
"To live like you were dyin'."

For SALE: One heart, slightly bruised...

So I've decided, I've been going about it all wrong. I've been searching for a man who will "have me" when I should have been looking for the lucky sap who will win me! Yes, I have my faults. Yes, I am a bit goofy and a little left of center. But when it comes right down to it, I'm a pretty great woman. I tend to treat people well - too well, in some cases.
Love me, respect me, kiss me, hold me, that's all I ask, and I will be yours forever. My heart is a powerful thing, it doesn't love easily but when it does, its something pretty amazing. I love to make someone happy and can spend the rest of my life doing just that! I want you to love me, I want you to get me.

You Get Me: Michelle Branch

So Im a little left of center
Im a little out of tune
Some say Im paranormal
So I just bend their spoon
Who wants to be ordinary
In a crazy, mixed-up world
I dont care what theyre sayin
As long as Im your girl

Hey, you are on my side
And they, they just roll their eyes

You get me
When nobody understands
You come and take the chance, baby
You get me
You look inside my wild mind
Never knowing what youll find
And still you want me all the time
Yeah, you do
Yeah, you get me

So what if I see the sunshine
In the pouring rain
Some people think Im crazy
But you say its okay
Youve seen my secret garden
Where all of my flowers grow
In my imagination
Anything goes

I, I am all you want
They, they just read me wrong

You get me
When nobody understands
You come and hold my hand, baby
You get me
You look inside my wild mind
Never knowing what you'll find
Still you want me all the time
Yeah, you do
cause you get me

Hey, you are on my side
They, they just roll their eyes
Yeah, yeah, yeah

cause you get me
When nobody understands
You come and take the chance, baby
You get me
When none of the pieces fit
You make sense of it
You get me
You look inside my wild mind
Never knowing what you'll find
And still I want you all the time
Yeah, I do
cause you get me
Yeah, oh, yeah, oh

Stressin me out

“If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it.”

-George Burns

Today has been one heck of a day for me. I, on a usual basis, avoid stress at all costs. I avoid anything that might cause me stress because I can't stand it. I don't know how to relax once I get all wound up, and it takes a toll on my body. I get sick, I break out, I am just miserable. One thing that is really stressful is the unknown and waiting. Just tell me how the book is going to end so I can get on with it, I want to know what is going to happen.
I have a job interview in the morning, and while I have had several job interviews it doesn't stop me from stressing myself silly. I should be sleeping now, but I'm wide awake. I took Tylenol PM almost 2 hours ago, and a muscle relaxant an hour ago and I'm wide awake. I gotta get up in 6 hours, and I have to work tomorrow night so I need some sleep. I need something in my life to be easy, to be uncomplicated, I need to find something I do and do it well. I need that one stable thing that I can count on, that makes the good, the bad, and the ugly easier to deal with. I want this stress to go away!

Is this not the cutest thing ever?!?!?

I went and saw Chet tonight and when I got there, his daughter Valerie gave me this picture. It is a picture of me, her and her dad. She wrote out all of our names on the little purple sticky note on the bottom right hand corner. She explained to me that She and I were wearing crowns cause we were princesses and her dad had a crown it was just a little one. She also put the first letter of each of our names at the top. She told met that I could take the sticky notes off and put them wherever I wanted and that I could take the picture and put it in my room. We settled on the fact that it will look the best hanging on my fridge. What a precious girl! She nearly broke my heart when it came time to put her to bed. She bawled and bawled and bawled. Even after we left the room, Chet pointed out that she was crying my name. So I said I would go back in there and talk to her. She told me that I was her bestest friend ever and she just didn't want me going home. I tried to explain to her that I would see her next week and that she just had to go to school and get smart and then I would see her later. She told me that even if she goes to lots of school, Macie will always be smarter than her cause she already finished first grade. LOL The tears just kept streaming down her face as we talked. Chet came in a few minutes later and tried to reason with her and tell her that it makes it harder on everyone else when she crys. And that it wasn't fair for her to do that. I had to laugh. Girls are girls, they are just emotional and its going to get worse as then get older. Bring on the teenage years where everyone makes them mad, and everything makes them cry.

Have you ever been this tired?

I had to work the last few nights (Friday and Saturday night) and I got home from work around 830am. I guess I fell asleep around 9am and for some odd reason I woke up at 1030. That wouldn't be so bad but I must have been rather delirious because i thought that I woke up due to my alarm going off. So I got up, brushed my teeth, put my contacts back in, and hopped in the tub. I was so drunkenly tired that I dozed off for a for a minute or two in the tub. I couldn't figure out why I was so tired. After I got out of the tub, I looked at my phone (something I am not sure if I did before this or not) but I saw that it was only 1045am! What on earth was i doing up? I didn't have to get up until 3. So I put my pjs back on, took out my contacts yet again and fell immediately back to sleep. Even though waking up at 3 only meant I got 6 hours of sleep it felt like a ton of sleep compared to my hour and a half before. LOL

The Big Girl Panties Are Kinda Scratchy

"Grow up!"

At some point in time, you heard it too. From your parents or a teacher, maybe a significant other or a husband or wife. Maybe one of your closest friends lost patience with you and said it out of frustration. Oh, just grow up already!

What does that mean to you, to "grow up?" To have achieved a state where you can handle your own life with the least drama and distraction? Some might suggest that the meat and potatoes of being a grown-up are financial independence -- you have your own place, a job and resultant paycheck, and hopefully health coverage. Bills get paid on time, and your credit's good. You file your taxes and suck it up when you owe Uncle Sam. You can complain about all if this, but you act like a grown-up, because to do otherwise is unwise.

In other words, your life isn't a drag on others. You're not a "dependent" anymore. I suppose that could be considered "grown up." I have never really prided myself on being called a "grown-up" and many of you who know me know that I reserve the right to act like a child every now and then, and sometimes it may be more often than I should. However, all and all I think I have reached the point where my responsibilities creep up everywhere and I can no longer deny that I am in fact a grown up. I used to tell myself that once I was married, I would then in fact be a "grown up." However I am going to be 29 in a matter of 2 months, and I really can't wait for that "excuse." Besides, I know a lot married people, who are more of child than my 12 year old sister.

However being a grown up is not strictly a financial thing or reaching a certain age thing. Part of growing up is being able to say your sorry, and realize that you have made a mistake, (whether intentionally or unintentionally) and someone got hurt. Its taking responsibility for your actions and realizing that you are not always going to be right. And sometimes even when you are without a doubt "right", being the bigger person, and bowing out of an argument when you realize no solution is ever going to be reached.

I think that growing up means realizing that the "way you are" does not have to be permanent. You can always change! You CAN become a better house keeper, you CAN learn to mellow out. You CAN learn to make a list, and you CAN learn to go without. You CAN learn to be a little more laid back, or you CAN learn to take life a little more seriously. Just because you are a certain way now, does not mean that you cannot learn to change. Part of being a grown up is being flexible for change. Maybe the way you have learned to do things is not necessarily the best way to do it, or the one that will bring the most happiness to you and those around you. Growing up may mean that there will be change.

I think that growing up means remembering you once said, I love you and that you meant it, no matter how things ended. Being a grown-up, too, means having a really good memory when it comes to the person who stood by you in all those bad times. Grown-ups don't cheat. Well, they do, but they're not being grown-ups when they do it.

I think that growing up means being able to say "I don't know." And letting go of that child-ego that made you feel as though everything you thought and believed was not only right, but indeed fact.

I hate having to be a grown-up, I really do! I hate cleaning house and doing laundry (I swear I just did it YESTERDAY, why does it have to be done again!?!). I hate paying my bills and balancing my money to make sure all my bills get paid and on time. I really hate taking DVDs back to the video store on time. Blockbuster knows that in certain cases they will have to call me 2 or 3 times, and in some cases, they will just have to charge my card, I might as well just keep the movie....

But the hardest part about growing up is the change that has to occur inside that tells you how to live sensibly and diligently, with compassion and fairness to the others (even when you don't get it back in return). Sometimes it's comes naturally, but often, you have to sit down and ask yourself, "Am I handling this like a mature adult?" That's always a tough one to answer. The internal "grow up!" command we give ourselves is sort of like eating your mental and emotional carrots. They suck, but they're good for your "vision". LOL Being a grown up is not always a fun thing to do, but it is the RIGHT thing to do.

I'd hate to think that everyone was truly "grown-up" all the time. That would be boring, wouldn't it? Everyone should run, when they want to, ride bikes, eat Twinkies, watch cartoons on Saturday morning, if that floats their boat. There are nonthreatening ways of being delightfully childlike to the people around you. The key word here being child"like" not childish.

But at the end of the day (or the night), we're all grown-ups again. Because we know, childhood is over and gone.

Monica Night

For my last night before having to return back to work I was able to go down to Saginaw (near Fort Worth) to visit my friend Monica. She said she has been a little down lately, so we came up with a great recipe for smiles. We went to the Grapevine Mills Mall for dinner, movie and crazy pictures. A guarantee to make at least ME smile. It was a great night, we had a blast. Food was great, and movie was great, expect for not the ending I wanted. I hate it when a movie is perfect right until then end and then bam, not the ending you had waited for during the whole movie. *sigh* Oh well, it was still a great night!

A photo to start off the night

A photo Op

"They're Real and they're Spectacular"

Always entertaining myself

HUH?

Just like Kayne West

HEHE

Too cool

YUM!

I love to try on hats!

All smiles at dinner